“Oh Christmas pig, Oh Christmas Pig”

The various holidays have taken on a new look over the years. No longer do we have simple homemade Halloween decorations, now we have huge, store-bought pumpkins, blow-up goblins and plastic witches. Same thing for Thanksgiving. Who ever heard of outdoor Thanksgiving lights and decorations when we were little?
Of course, the greatest decoration fiasco is Christmas. People go all out in the Christmas light wars to have the most and gaudiest displays. Then, there are the air-pumped up Santas surrounded by falling fake snow, Frosty the Snowman air-filled to eight feet tall. The simple Nativity scene with all the fixings has now been outdone with the all-electric wise men and assorted animals, with holiday music blasting in the background. I even saw a blow-up nativity scene. The last couple of years the wire reindeer and assorted Christmas figures adorned with lights popped up in many front yards.
Years ago, I refused to join the Christmas rush to decorate. Wife Patti always wanted something in the holiday-ish outdoor Christmas campaign. I finally gave in and when living in our previous home, decorated a large evergreen with assorted lights. Mind you, I never removed the lights when the holiday passed, I just kind of let them grow into the tree, adding a string or two, as the years passed.
Wife Patti decided one year to decorate some front yard bushes, but in all her efforts, it looked like someone just thrown the lights up in the air and they fell wherever.
Now that we have moved into our new, more visible home on Route 350 in Walworth, Wife Patti was back on her rant about outdoor jollies. “We have to – at least – put up some lights” she demanded.
Then, it happened. While shopping at K-Mart, she spotted the envy of every Christmas decorator. It was a wire, pink Christmas pig with white wings and a halo. The Christmas pig, like reindeer and assorted figurines of the past only needed to be plugged in to give holiday joy.
After she spotted the pig in a Christmas display, she squealed with joy. “I gotta have it,” she proclaimed. I begrudgingly asked the store manager where the Christmas pig could be found. He, and another employee looked at me strangely. Once I showed them the display, both shrugged their shoulders and said they were unaware they even had Christmas pigs. I thought my luck would carry through when just then, a woman in a wheelchair wheeled up and said she spotted several of the pigs in a back corner. I immediately made the woman aware that she was dead to me.
Wife Patti got her Christmas pig and proudly carried it to the front of the check-outs. In a rather loud voice I announced. “Attention K-Mart shoppers, come see the sale of a Christmas pig, perhaps the only such sale you will see in your lives.” The manager and check-out cashiers, along with several customers began laughing.
It cost $80 bucks! That did not include the three-year extended warranty for an additional $8. The stupid pig snapped together with a bit of help from daughter-in-law Christy and some additional plastic ties I had in my workbench.
Every night the front yard Christmas pig is lit with pride, hers, not mine.

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