Wednesday, January 18th, 2017

Bring “Old Sparky” back?

It took 16 years but a woman in Texas just became the 500th person executed in the state that executes more prisoners than any other state according to a piece in the New York Times.

This 500th person executed was the former wife of a Black Panther (those guys who blocked a voting place in Philadelphia who Obama and Holder refused to prosecute). She used a butcher knife and candelabra to beat and stab to death a 70 year-old lady.

Texas also records the last words of those they execute.

A man went to his neighbor’s apartment under the pretense of borrowing sugar. He returned later, forced the 29 year-old mother of a 5 year-old son into her bedroom, bound her hands and feet, raped her and then used a rifle to kill her. He said before the injection, “I am so terribly sorry. I wish I could die more than once.” He said he didn’t even know her but still killed her.

Another man convicted of shooting a man to death after trying to kidnap the man’s girlfriend said as they strapped him down, “Sir, in honor of a true American hero, let’s roll.”

And a man who beat an 11 year-old boy to death with a flashlight said, “Tell my son I love him very much. God bless everybody. Continue to walk with God. Go Cowboys!”

Texas used to use the electric chair (“Old Sparky”) but now uses needles so these murdering butchers don’t feel so much pain. It’s ok for their victims to feel pain but not them.

I would suggest we go back to the cowboy days and just hang these guys within a few days of their convictions. Or bring “Old Sparky” out of the garage fire her up.

The Texas Coalition to Abolish the Death Penalty says “executions do little to deter criminals.”

I would say yes they do.  After “Old Sparky” lights up, these guys won’t be committing any more violent crimes and won’t be taking up prison space costing the rest of us big bucks.


According to David Letterman, NASCAR tried hiring inner city kids to work for them recently but was unsuccessful because:

They couldn’t sit upright while driving

No room for the gun under the front seat

They couldn’t work on a car while holding up their pants

No Cadillac’s approved for competition

When they crashed, they would bail out and run

And they couldn’t wear their helmets sideways


Volume 14 is now available! If you enjoy these columns, you will love having them in booklet form and they are free (yes, non-Obama-government free stuff!). Just stop by my office at 644 East Main, Palmyra (Route 31 across from Kwikfill) and pick up some. Also pick up my “Slammer 20oz Glass Mug” (it’s outlawed as too big in NY City so you may wind up in the slammer) to slam down your favorite beverage.